Hey guys!!! … I’m back 🙂
Life has been happening at full speed, but I promise to be more consistent with blogging! There are a couple cool places that I’ve visited this year so expect a couple fun travel posts in the next upcoming weeks.
To start off my resurgence I decided to write about something that I never thought I would. When I think about it I feel like I could count on one hand the number of people who have an idea of the situation and there’s probably only a good 3 people (including myself) who know the full details, but Imma keep it cute and give you guys the gist and what I learned from it….so here we go!
I was in a “relationship” that lasted almost 2 years – to be honest by today’s standards it was more like a situationship.
For those unfamiliar with what a situationship is Urban Dictionary defines it as “a relationship that has no label on it; more than a friendship, but not quite a relationship.”
I’m more prone to define it as a situationship because he would say we’re dating, but I would be like “well ehhhhh maybe” lol
Though I have no hard feelings and I still think he’s a great guy I chose to ignore a huge dealbreaker……..he was a “ghoster”.
A “ghoster” or ghosting is known as “breaking off a relationship by stopping all communication and contact with the partner without any apparent warning or justification, as well as ignoring the partner’s attempts to reach out or communicate”, but in our case he would never break it off he would just disappear and reappear.
Now this is where it gets tricky because if I reveal too much some friends and family might catch on to who he is and I don’t have time for that, so lets just say that he got a job out of state which caused our situation to become long distance at the very start. I welcomed the distance because I don’t really like people (just kidding), but I had no problem with it.
We would talk or text almost all the time or every time he was free. He even came back to visit and we officially went on a date.
A few months in, the communication began to slowly dwindle until it stopped completely. I would not hear from him until months later where he would give some excuse that I would end of accepting and we would go in this merry go round until one time He came to visit again…we went out…had a great time, but in the process of making plans to go out again before he left he disappeared again. …that’s when I got off the merry go round.
I learned a couple things from this:
- I think I kept giving him chances to show up because of a number of things. He was actually real cool and we pretty much have known each other for years, so it was a new experience of being comfortable from the start. I also, learned from this not to set up an idea of what a relationship could be or turn into and to instead sit in the present and let things flow as they flow with no preconceived notions.
- I learned that we were actually pretty similar because there are times that I can just disappear because of the overall stress of life or even just be non-communicative and in my head and that’s not conducive for any type of relationship whether romantic or platonic.
- Lastly, when someone ghosts you once, they will ghost you again so take that first time as a red flag and exit stage left lol
For those wondering why this post is called “Danny Phantom” – that’s my best friend’s nickname for him – (if you don’t know who or what that show is just google it and you’ll understand why lol).
That’s it for now. Until next time 🙂